Still

It is only when we stand very still that we can do exactly what God intended us to do…

Christ on the Cross with Mary and Saint John (Weyden)

My mother in law was not well.  In fact she was mortally ill.  She would not recover from that illness.  About a month ago, my husband went to Lebanon to be with her during the peak of her illness.

Now, my husband is a typical man.  He is active and busy and always on the move.  It was an unusual experience for him to spend weeks sitting beside a critically ill woman and waiting for whatever she needed.  It is not that he begrudged this time, it was rather that he struggled to understand what the purpose of this initiative was.  After all, he could not cure her or even make her feel much better as she was experiencing a lot of pain during those weeks and there was little that anyone could do other than sit quietly.

While he was away – because of the nature of the place, he had limited access to internet or television or computers or even decent phone reception.  In other words, his days were spent sitting still beside a suffering soul.

And I have been reflecting on that time – because it was a horrifically difficult time, but also a beautiful one.

All of us are called to suffer and die.  That is why we are born.  We are born so that we will suffer on this earth to prepare ourselves by following in Christ’s way of the Cross so that when we die we shall have lived like Christ and therefore, we shall have a chance to die like Christ – suffering for sinners and in atonement of sin.

Now – to be clear – I am not suggesting that my mother in law was more sinful than any other soul.  Rather, she was a good woman who probably sinned far less than me.  So, her suffering was not necessarily to atone for her own sins – just as Christ’s suffering, or that of the Blessed Virgin, was not to atone for their own personal sins, but rather to atone for the sins of the world.

And when I think about that time – of my husband sitting in silence beside that suffering soul – I think of the Blessed Virgin and the Beloved Apostle Saint John.  These two stood at the Foot fo the Cross and waited in silence while God of the Universe died.  And they waited there without phone or internet or television.  And they did it in stillness and silence, because it is only when we stand very still that we can do exactly what God intended us to do…

For with prayer, I stand on Holy Ground where everything is clear. Here. At the Foot of the Cross.