“Christ gave our pain and struggles a holy significance, a redemptive power, which makes it a privilege for us to suffer with Him.” (Scott Hahn, “Hope for the Hard Times”).
I have been thinking about suffering.
Suffering is such a difficult thing to view with my mere human eyes. I remember when my little baby died before he was even born, my entire soul flinched away from the suffering that I knew would be coming to me as a result of this. I knew that it was going to hurt – grief always does – and I knew that it was going to hurt a lot because I loved that unborn soul more than I loved my own soul. And the greater the love, the greater the grief when we lose the one we love.
And even today – all these years later – even now that I can look at the whole experience with the eyes of faith, that it is truly a profound thing to experience grief.
And yet – though I would not wish to suffer in that way again – time has shown me great benefits of that grief. Because that grief changed me in the deepest and most sacred parts of me. And for a long long time – prior to my conversion, which occurred through Grace and no merit of my own – I resented that change. I missed the person who I was before. I missed the happiness in my soul before that child went to heaven before I was ready. I missed everything.
And then – my some miracle that I shall never understand but always give thanks for – the happiness that was in my soul matured and blossomed and grew into the joy that is contained in it now. Because now – though my heart mourns for the physical presence of that child – my soul connects with him constantly. And I have come to understand that when suffering is viewed with the eyes of faith it is in fact a privilege… Scott Hahn wrote in “Hope for Hard Times”, “Christ gave our pain and struggles a holy significance, a redemptive power, which makes it a privilege for us to suffer with Him.” (Scott Hahn, “Hope for the Hard Times”).
And I have come to appreciate the words of Saint Augustine who wrote, “Know this: just as the wood of the ark saved the just from drowning, so too, by the mystery of His wooden Cross, does Christ, the Church’s God and King, save us from drowning in the sea of this world. In the symbol of a thing made of wood He gave human beings a foreshadowing of both the judgment to come and the salvation of the just.”
For once I can appreciate the privilege of suffering, I shall be able to understand the importance of putting away, “reputation and honour, and influence, and power, for my praise and strength shall be in You. (To) Enable me to carry out what I profess.” (Saint John Henry Newman).
For with prayer, I stand on Holy Ground where everything is clear. Here. At the Foot of the Cross.
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