“There is nothing so great as the Eucharist. If God had something more precious, He would have given it to us.” (Saint John Vianney).
My maternal grandmother is a very very old woman and I love her very much.
The other day, my parents took my grandmother with them on one of her very rare expeditions out of her home. Being of advanced age, her mobility is limited and she is often very tired, and a simple trip to a church is enough to completely exhaust her.
During their outing, my Grandmother was able to attend Mass and receive the blessed Eucharist.
I watched her as she was wheeled back down the aisle to her seat and I saw her face, streaming with tears.
And I have been thinking about that face ever since…
You see, I sort of understand that feeling of my grandmother’s… Years ago, when my little baby had died before he was even born, I spent a long time turning away from God in anger and grief. And then one day, after dropping my children off at school, I ran into the Church on their school grounds, and – very unexpectedly – stumbled upon the Exposition of the Blessed Sacrament.
And there I stood, inside a completely empty church – literally face to face with my God… And there – right in the middle of just another ordinary day, the clanging cymbals inside my heart stopped – just for a moment, and my face streamed with tears…
And for a moment, my only thought was, “Oh, I missed You my Beloved. I missed You so much. Where have you been?”
Even now – all these years later – when I recall that moment, I can feel that peace settle onto my soul and my heart slows and my breathing calms and I am at peace.
Now, all of this happened before the moment of my conversion – which occurred some years later through Grace and no merit of my own, while my darling little niece was very very sick – and even though in the years that followed, my road was very dark, some spark was kindled inside my soul.
That early morning encounter reminded me of how much I missed my God – who I had turned from in anger.
And so, when I saw my grandmother – whose mobility and age and health prevent her from regularly attending the Holy Sacrament of the Mass – being moved to tears through her participation in that most Blessed Sacrifice, I was myself moved to tears.
For I have felt the anguish of that dying woman (for all of us are dying in this world, none more than the elderly). And I have felt that hungering for a God who I cannot reach…
And I saw my Beloved reach for her that day, just as He reached for me. And I prayed that He gives her comfort. For all of us need the comfort that only the Prince of Peace can provide. And He knows that. That is why He gave us the Blessed Eucharist. After all, in the words of Saint John Vianney, “There is nothing so great as the Eucharist. If God had something more precious, He would have given it to us.”
For with prayer, I stand on Holy Ground where everything is clear. Here. At the Foot of the Cross.
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