Divorce

I have divorced my God many many times, and every time He waits for me to return and lovingly takes me back!

The Eternal Father (Paolo Caliari Veronese)

I have been thinking about divorce.

I have long believed that marriage is a SACRAMENT because it requires supernatural GRACE to remain married.  In my mind it is some sort of miracle for a couple of people who are completely different – different families, different backgrounds, even at times different nationalities and religions – to remain together.  And they come together and do all sorts of crazy things – like have children together and socialise with their families of origin together, and make friends together.  And when they do those things they are able to literally become one in many ways.

While this does not mean that the spouses have no independence or individuality, it does mean that their married life is one of constant compromise.  And that constant compromise allows them to constantly put their partner first – even when at times they feel that their partner is very wrong about something.

And I have been thinking about that because a marriage is like a covenant.  And a covenant is a very special agreement that is made between two parties where they are able to commit to each other in a sacred way.  The covenants that God made with Noah, Abraham, and Moses in the Old Testament were the agreements that God made with His people to enable them to have a relationship with Him.  This is the relationship that God made with us – with me (and with you too).

And the strange thing about this agreement is that when I turned away from God, He never turned away from me.

I divorce Him with my sin, and instead of ranting and raving and exacting revenge, instead of engaging a lawyer and fighting for His rights, God waits quietly and patiently for me to turn around and look back at Him.

And today, that image of my forsaken God, is heartbreaking.

I cheat on Him and he loves me so much that even though I break His heart with my blatant disregard of Him, He continues to wait for me, loving me and forgiving me.

I have made my God the spurned spouse, and I am not worthy even of being in the same universe as He is.  And still I continue to shame myself in front of Him and hurt Him – He who is blameless and flawless and without sin.

And today, as I consider what it must cost an infinite Being with infinite Love to have to stand behind me and observe all my cheating and all my filth and sin, I am simply moved to tears...

And when you really stop to think about that it is just the saddest thing.  Because when a soul spurns their God, the soul suffers and the God suffers and while the soul deserves to suffer for the choices that they made, their God does not.

And thinking about that today, I feel very sad about divorce – because I have divorced my God many many times, and every time He waits for me to return and lovingly takes me back!

For with prayer, I stand on Holy Ground where everything is clear. Here. At the Foot of the Cross.