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What has my poor God ever done to deserve the wrong that I ask Him to forgive…?


The Holy Trinity (Nicoletto Semitecolo)

We got a new little kitten recently.  And when he arrived, our juvenile cat got a little bit confused.  She did not quite know what to do about him.  And during this time – in those initial weeks – our juvenile cat became afraid and spent a lot of time trying to avoid us and anything to do with us.  Now, this was a terribly sad thing for us, because we really enjoyed spending time with our juvenile cat and we were very sad that she was suddenly leaving us behind and refusing to come close to us.

 

So, we spoke to the vet about what to do and he explained that as cats are naturally territorial, our current cat would be experiencing a lot of stress and anxiety in relation to welcoming a new cat to the family and as a result would need a little bit of extra tender love and care.  Some of the ways that we could show this to the cat would be to pack the new kitten away and allow the old cat her space in the areas where the new kitten had now been parading.  Another way would be to offer the old cat some extra treats and snacks that she loved so that she would like coming close (at least to get a snack) again.  A third way was to be especially gentle and kind to our old cat so that she would learn to trust us again.

 

And so, my family and I spent quite a bit of time and effort allowing the juvenile cat to feel loved and welcomed by us.  Eventually we put the two cats together and they got on quite well – cats apparently hunt each other when they play so they spend a lot of time pouncing on each other and running away…

 

But I have been thinking about this today as I have been thinking about God.  You see, God is like our family with those two cats.  He can see our fears – even though those fears are so senseless – and He waits for us with treats, which are like the Graces we receive on the journey.  Sometimes, He removes distractions from our lives, just as my family removed the kitten for a while.  And He does this – not out of vengeance or hatred, but out of love – so that we can better understand what to focus on.  And just as our juvenile cat learned to focus more on our family and how much we loved her and cared about her, so too do we learn to focus on God and how much He loves and cares about us.

 

And today, I am so grateful for the time that my Beloved gives to me.  Because without that time I would be completely unable to do anything at all, and I would be afraid of nothing – just as my juvenile cat was afraid of a little kitten.  And nobody has time for nonsense like that…

 

For with prayer, I stand on Holy Ground where everything is clear. Here. At the Foot of the Cross.

 I believe that it is easier to forgive a stranger than to forgive someone who I love very much and to whom I am very close…

 

When a stranger wrongs me, I can forgive them and turn my back on them and live a life where they are not an intimate part of my life anymore.  This means that I am able to forgive and forget – so to speak.

 

Now consider the case of my husband wronging me.  Well, that is a completely different scenario.  When my husband wrongs me I must choose to forgive him.  If I do not make the decision to forgive him for the wrong he has done to me (or if he does not choose to forgive me for the wrong I have done to him) then our relationship cannot continue.  Instead we will dissolve into argument and bickering and anger and hatred and sadness.  But think about what it really means to forgive my husband.  It means that I make a choice to forgive the wrong and move through my relationship allowing him to start again – wiping the slate clean, even though he may have broken my heart.

 

And this is significant, because being human and a flawed human (as am I) it is very likely that my husband will wrong me again in our life together.  It is also not only possible but likely that he will wrong me in the same way and deliberately in the future.  It is possible that I will not only have to forgive him for this wrongdoing once, but I will have to forgive him a hundred times.

 

“Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, ‘Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?’  Jesus answered, ‘I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.’” (Matthew 18:21-22).

 

And I have been thinking about that today.  Because it is a difficult thing to do to forgive a loved one – a husband or a brother or a parent or a friend…  And it is difficult because we KNOW that we will need to forgive not once or even seven times, but seventy-seven times and even more often.

 

And I have been thinking about the miracle of the Sacrament of Reconciliation.  You see, when we ask forgiveness for our sins of God, He is not forgiving a stranger.  He is not even forgiving a spouse or a brother or a child or a friend.  He is forgiving His own creature, whose entire existence is made possible only by His own magnanimity.  And so, even when He is hurt and upset at the things I have done to wrong Him, He cannot forgive me and turn away – because without Him I cannot be.  Instead, He can forgive me and hold me close – even while I continue to wrong Him time and time again.

 

And when I think about that today, it does not seem so difficult to forgive my husband after all.  You see, I am a sinner – as is he.  But what has my poor God ever done to deserve the wrong that I ask Him to forgive…?  What has He ever done?

 

For with prayer, I stand on Holy Ground where everything is clear. Here. At the Foot of the Cross.

 

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