If we understand that suffering is an opportunity to unite with Christ for salvation, that is when we grow strong.
For a very very very long time I had a very uncomfortable pain on my right side. The pain would come and go and I could never really predict what would cause it to come on. There were of course some common symptoms, but there was nothing definite. Sometimes, if I yawned the wrong way I would experience that pain. At other times, a cough or a sneeze would trigger it. Sometimes, if I lifted something heavy, the pain would intensify, and at still other times, the pain could be caused by nothing at all.
While I was experiencing these symptoms, I visited many doctors, chiropractors and physiotherapists to try to understand how to handle the pain, what was causing it and how to help myself to live with it. I underwent many scans and tests seeking answers about the cause of the pain, and after many years of investigation, I finally gave up and accepted that the pain was caused by some sort of muscle tension and would be something that I would live with forever…
And while I experienced that pain I was quite afraid. Even though the scans and tests came back as normal, I worried at first about my physical health, thinking to myself that the pain was a symptom of an underlying condition and therefore was something to be taken seriously. Later – when the pain literally did not kill me – I worried instead that I was perhaps a little mentally unstable. I worried that I was experiencing a severe form of hypochondria by complaining about a pain that I considered severe and that had no underlying physical explanation…
After many many years, the cause of the pain was finally uncovered and though it was not life-threatening, it did in fact require surgical intervention.
Following the surgery, the post-operative pain I experienced during my recovery was quite literally less severe than the pain caused by my condition. And I was very grateful for that.
Now, following that surgery, I have been able to experience the pain, in a far far far less severe form and when I do experience that pain, I am not afraid of it anymore. Rather, I understand what it is and why I experience it and I am able to bear it better than I otherwise could... And I have been reflecting on that today.
You see, that pain – or the fear of that pain – is like suffering. When we fear suffering, instead of bearing it bravely and working with it for the salvation of souls (including our own), we struggle against it in fear. When we do not view suffering with a Christian perspective, we are unable to use it as the work that it is for a resolution that is eternal. In other words, without a Christian perspective, that suffering is like the pain that I could not understand, and it overwhelms us and leads us to wrong conclusions that weaken us. If instead, we understand that suffering is an opportunity to unite with Christ for salvation, that is when we grow strong. And in that strength, we can rest in God…
And that is what that (now mild) pain reminds me of today. Thank God, God left me a whisper of pain so that I could remember…
For with prayer, I stand on Holy Ground where everything is clear. Here. At the Foot of the Cross.
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