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Writer's pictureSarah Raad

End

“Each of us must come to that quiet, awful time, when we will appear before the Lord of the vineyard, and answer for the deeds done in the body, whether they be good or bad...” (Saint John Henry Newman).


Judas Iscariot (Sascha Schneider)

Recently someone who is dear to me was suffering very greatly.  Her physical pain and suffering was very intense and I was very distressed to hear that she was in pain.

 

If we were mere animals experiencing a pain like that, we would be taken to a veterinarian and they would given us a medication that would cause the end of our earthly lives.  And often – when a human is suffering – people will say things like, “I would not allow a dog to suffer as they are suffering.”  Or, “It is inhumane for a human to suffer int his way.”  Or, “Surely something could be done to end this misery?”

 

And I listen to and have heard things like this all my life.  And it is only now – following my conversion, which happened through Grace and no merit of my own, that I can see the gift of such a suffering as that.

 

Saint Faustina was at times warned by the Blessed Virgin or Christ Himself – during her visions – that she would have serious suffering to come to her in the future.  And when that happened, her response was to offer her suffering in ADVANCE to God.  She would tell God that she might be too weak to offer her suffering when it was upon her, and so instead, she offered it to God in advance.  And then she did something that I consider quite extraordinary…  She prepared herself for the suffering to come through discipline.  In other words, she voluntarily assumed suffering into her life so that she would be able to strengthen her discipline and resolve and bear the suffering that God sent her.

 

Now, why would she wish to do this?  Surely it is a crazy thing to prepare for suffering? But is it?

 

After all, an athlete training for an event voluntarily puts their body and mind through various challenges to allow themselves to be strengthened and to deliver the strongest possible performance at the event itself.  And how is that any different from the preparation of the soul for suffering?  After all, an athlete’s preparation for an event is painful and difficult and often not very much fun.


And there is such benefit in suffering.  You see, an animal – which we can put down to end their life to prevent them from suffering – has no spiritual soul, and therefore no merit to be gained from suffering.  Suffering is no gift to an animal.  But a human soul is spiritual.  And that means that suffering is NOT something that should be feared and avoided.  It is a gift from God – and when offered to Him to atone for sin (all sin) – it can cause great good.

 

Saint John Henry Newman said, “Each of us must come to the evening of life. Each of us must enter on eternity.  Each of us must come to that quiet, awful time, when we will appear before the Lord of the vineyard, and answer for the deeds done in the body, whether they be good or bad...  We do not like to know how sinful we are. We love those who prophecy smooth things to us, and we are angry with those who tell us of our faults. But on that day, not one fault only, but all the secret, as well as evident, defects of our character will be clearly brought out. We shall see what we feared to see here, and much more. And then, when the full sight of ourselves comes to us, who will not wish that he had known more of himself here, rather than leaving it for the inevitable day to reveal it all to him!”

 

And I have been thinking about that today, as I have been thinking about suffering.  For it seems that my poor friend has been blessed.  And that blessing requires many prayers to bear it…

 

For with prayer, I stand on Holy Ground where everything is clear. Here. At the Foot of the Cross.

 

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